May the Child Be With You: Rediscovering Playfulness in Adulthood

Milestone birthdays often feel like markers of success and maturity. As kids and teens, we look forward to getting older—16, 18, 21, 30, 40, and beyond—believing each step brings us closer to “having it all figured out.” Along the way, we’re encouraged to shed the “childish” parts of ourselves—silliness, playfulness, imagination, and wonder—in favor of being seen as responsible and mature. But as the birthdays add up, many of us begin to realize that adulting isn’t always what it’s cracked up to be, and we find ourselves quietly longing for those earlier, simpler days.

Recently, during a visit to a friend’s house, I experienced something that confirmed this perspective. As soon as we arrived, my friend excitedly brought my partner downstairs to show him his special room filled with Star Wars memorabilia, knowing he is a huge fan. As my daughter and I watched—and giggled at the two grown, “mature” men lighting up with excitement over the collection—I had an “aha” moment.

Maybe holding onto those childlike parts of ourselves isn’t something to outgrow or be embarrassed by. Yes, we need to mature—pay our bills, make responsible decisions, and navigate adult life. But there is also real value in keeping curiosity, playfulness, creativity, and humor alive within us. In fact, research on adult playfulness suggests that people who maintain these qualities throughout adulthood tend to experience greater happiness, stronger relationships, lower stress, and overall higher well-being (Barnett, 2011; Proyer, 2017).

I have often wondered: where does the child we started as go if it isn’t nurtured and given space to come out? Does that part of us get buried beneath all the adult responsibilities we take on? Do we become embarrassed by it? Ashamed of it?

But maybe growing up doesn’t mean leaving our inner child behind. Maybe it means learning how to responsibly care for our adult lives while still making space for that childlike spirit to come out and play.

So, in the spirit of Star Wars—May the Child be with you.